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Darwin Awards
2012 Darwin Awards
Email a Friend Named in honor of Charles Darwin, the father of evolution, the Darwin Awards commemorate those who improve our gene pool by removing themselves from it. Next Prev Random

 
 
Smokin' Hot Sauce!
2012 Darwin Award Nominee
Confirmed True by Darwin

27 February 2012, North Carolina) "It was just a freak incident," said an investigator, that caused the death of 43-year-old Gary Allen Banning. Gary was at a friend's apartment when he spotted a salsa jar containing a mystery fluid. Thinking that it was an alcoholic beverage, he helped himself to a sizeable swig of gasoline! Naturally enough, he immediately spit out the offending liquid onto his clothes. Then, to recover from the shock, Gary lit a cigarette.

Whoosh! Gas+Flame=Combustion.

Firefighters responded to calls reporting a fire in the apartment, and found a badly burned man sitting on a charred carpet. The following morning, Gasoline Gary died at the UNC Burn Center in Chapel Hill.

Two mistakes caused his death. The first mistake was minor: gulping a golden liquid from a salsa jar. Although Darwin Awards editors feel that a jar of yellow liquid is best left sealed, drinking its contents usually does not lead to combustion. But the second mistake--lighting up a cigarette to recover from the shock of taking a mouthful of gasoline--was a decision that an average five year old would consider questionable. As the late Bill Hicks said, "Darn, we lost another idiot."

Gary's friend was a mechanic and kept the jar of gasoline near the kitchen sink to remove grease from his hands.

Reader comments: "That's some HOT salsa!"
"Gasoline and chlorine are both effective at cleansing the gene pool." -Quinton W.
"you can't fix stupid, but stupid eventually fixes itself." -Issac T.
"Dumb people should smoke more!" -Frank G.
"Great Balls Of Fire!" -Darren L.
"'Shine' is generally clear, so even by Carolina standards this is dumb." -Patrick T.
"The shrinking gene pool." -Nery M.

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Submitted by: C Avery, Brad Y. Laurie A. Todd, Greg Barr, Scott R. Corey, and thirty others.
Reference: www.globalpost.com(AP), www.wect.com, many more news outlets.

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The Darwin Awards Condom

Keep yourself out of the gene pool!
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