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Darwin Awards
2006 Darwin Awards
Named in honor of Charles Darwin, the father of evolution, the Darwin Awards commemorate those who improve our gene pool by removing themselves from it. Next Prev Random

Email a Friend Score One For Goliath
2006 Darwin Award Nominee
Confirmed True by Darwin

The one that didn't get away.

(9 September 2006, Florida) A fearsome mythical giant named Goliath was felled by David's humble slingshot. But a modern leviathan vs. a speargun is another tale altogether, as a 42-year-old man named Gary discovered.

Although it was outlawed in 1990, poaching giant groupers remains surprisingly popular in the Florida Keys. These muscular fish can weigh 600 pounds, yet underwater hunters voluntarily choose to tether themselves to the creatures with spearguns, in defiance of both the law and common sense.

Formerly called Jewfish, the Goliath Grouper is the world's largest grouper, attaining weights up to 600 pounds. They are quite illegal to hunt, and are generally too tough and wormy to eat, so killing one gives the spearfisher bragging rights only.

Of this elite group, our Darwin Award winner further distinguished himself by disregarding one essential spearfishing precaution. The "fit and experienced snorkeler" embarked on a grouper hunt without a knife to cut himself loose, guaranteeing that his next attack would be his last. "Not wearing a knife is like crossing I-95 with your eyes closed," explained one experienced diver.

In those final hours, the tables were turned, and the leviathan fish was given an opportunity to experience "catching a person." The body of the spearfisher was found pinned to the coral, 17 feet underwater. Three coils of line were wrapped around his wrist, and one very dead grouper was impaled at the other end of the line.

Reader Comments:
"Fish Catches Man Story."
"Sounds fishy to me."
"A reel fish tale."

ORIGINAL SUBMISSIONS: (1) (2) (3)
A Similar Personal Acct.

DarwinAwards.com © 1994 - 2009
Submitted by: Arjan Kop, Steve Walsh, Buford Pruitt
Reference: Miami Herald, Reuters, Yahoo! News

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The Darwin Awards Gift Shop

Darwin Awards III: Survival of the Fittest

Hardback. 304 pages. Autographed.
$15
The human race's most popular humor series returns with a brand-new collection of macabre mishaps and misadventures. Honoring those who improve our gene pool by inadvertently removing themselves from it, the Darwin Awards III shows once more how uncommon common sense still is.

Salute the sheriff who inadvertently shot himself--twice! Witness the insurance defrauder who amputated his leg with a chainsaw! Heed the story of the farmer who avoided bee stings by sealing his head in a plastic bag! Cringe at the man crushed by a branch he'd just severed... directly over his head!

123 new stories, 18 full-page illustrations, plus discussions of transgenic animals, the origin of life, and more.

Autographed by Author!

 


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