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Darwin Awards
2005 Darwin Awards
Named in honor of Charles Darwin, the father of evolution, the Darwin Awards commemorate those who improve our gene pool by removing themselves from it. Next Prev Random

Email a Friend Mining for Elephants
2005 Darwin Award Nominee
Confirmed True by Darwin

(15 February 2005, Rushinga, Zimbabwe) The elephants were trampling Christian's maize field, which he had planted on an elephant trail of long standing. He had to find a way to fight back! Fortunately, there was an old minefield nearby, on the Zimbabwe-Mozambique border. Christian figured a few landmines planted around his field would soon teach the elephants a lesson they would never forget.

Christian may have gotten the idea of using the mines from a couple of incidents that had recently transpired. A local resident had been injured after picking up a landmine while herding cattle the week before. A week before that, another Rushinga man had lost part of his leg after stepping on a landmine. The other villagers saw the writing on the wall, and avoided the landmines.

But Christian realized they were just what he needed. Clearly, these mines could cause great damage to an elephant! He dug up five that had been exposed by recent heavy rains. As he carried them home, the unstable mines detonated, killing Christian instantly.

Then total number of elephants injured? Zero.

Reader Comments:
"Swords into plowshares..."
"Not the best laid plan."
"An electric fence never occurred to him?"
"Elephants 1, Villagers 0. Human stupidity rules again."
"An example of karmic retribution."
"Wildlife Conservation Measures in Zimbabwe"

DarwinAwards.com © 1994 - 2009
Submitted by: Douglas Ball
Reference: The Zimbabwe Herald

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Darwin Awards II: Unnatural Selection

Hardback. 240 pages. Autographed.
$15
A fresh collection of magnificent misadventures! Lust, Vanity, Gluttony, Greed, Sloth, Envy, and Wrath extract an evolutionary toll on the wicked. Salute the owner of an equipment training school who demonstrates the dangers of driving a forklift by failing to survive the filming of his own safety video. Witness the man who becomes a victim of his own strange passion for jumping into rivers. Heed the honest bricklayer who loses a battle of wits with 300 pounds of tools.

This book includes more History of the Awards, Gordon's Law, and 10 discussions of evolution, including speciation and the role of verbal memes in civilization.

Autographed by Author!

 


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