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1999 Personal Accounts
| The Darwin Awards salutes the spirit portrayed in the following personal accounts, submitted by loyal (and sometimes deceased) readers. |
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Newton's Laws of Motion
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(Between 1968 and 1975, Virginia) This true story is pretty silly, even though somebody gets killed. Next to Norfolk is a flat district known as Virginia Beach. It is so very flat that local kids had no place to hold SoapBox Derby races. The city filled an old "borrow" pit, where fill dirt had been excavated, with trash. They piled the trash scores of feet high. Locals called it Mount Trashmore. It was the highest point for miles around. When the dump was closed, it was covered with soil and turned into a park and SoapBox Derby contest track. A small pond was added next to it, for bluegill fishing and water skiing. A shindig was held to celebrate the opening of the new park. There was a barbecue, there were bands, and a local skier put on an exhibition of kite skiing. A boat pulled him around the small pond, attached to a kite, until the dismount. He intended to drop feet-first into the water, but he neglected to obey Newton's laws of motion. When he released his towrope he continued on a forward trajectory instead of following the boat on its circular route. He landed on the garbage side of the shore, 50 feet away from the pond, in front of several hundred merrymakers. That was the last flight of the now-extinct dodo. DarwinAwards.com © 1994 - 2008 Submitted by: Heagar Reference: Norfolk Ledger-Star |
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