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Darwin Awards
2003 Personal Accounts
Email a Friend The Darwin Awards salutes the spirit portrayed in the following personal accounts, submitted by loyal (and sometimes reluctant) readers. Next Prev Random

Gas Spill
2003 Personal Account

(1993, Pennsylvania) I will be the first to admit that this only qualifies as an Honorable Mention -- but how many people get the *prosecution* to request a mental competency hearing?

In Pittsburgh, my roommate's coworker was gassing up her car. The automatic shutoff didn't engage, so when the tank was full, a little gas overflowed. When she realized this, she declared that she wasn't paying for gas on the ground -- she would only pay for what was in her car. The attendant stated that she had to pay for all the gas she had pumped. She reiterated that not all of it went into her car.

She then said, "Watch, I'll prove it."

Prove it she did. She threw her *lit* cigarette on the ground where the gas spilled. The puddle ignited! Fortunately, they were able to put out the fire before anything worse happened.

She was arrested for inciting a catastrophe. While listening to the testimony at her preliminary hearing, the prosecutor stated, "That's crazy. That's insane!" The defense attorney -- either spotting a good line of defense, or agreeing with the prosecutor -- asked, "Are you going to request a psychiatric evaluation?" To which the prosecutor replied, "You damn betcha."

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Darwin Awards II: Unnatural Selection

Hardback. 240 pages. Autographed.
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A fresh collection of magnificent misadventures! Lust, Vanity, Gluttony, Greed, Sloth, Envy, and Wrath extract an evolutionary toll on the wicked. Salute the owner of an equipment training school who demonstrates the dangers of driving a forklift by failing to survive the filming of his own safety video. Witness the man who becomes a victim of his own strange passion for jumping into rivers. Heed the honest bricklayer who loses a battle of wits with 300 pounds of tools.

This book includes more History of the Awards, Gordon's Law, and 10 discussions of evolution, including speciation and the role of verbal memes in civilization.

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