Charles Darwin's Darwin Awards 
HOME
Darwin Awards
Honorable Mentions
Urban Legends
Personal Accounts
Slush Pile
2000 Personals
One Cool Dude
Man With Gas Can
Excellent Adventure
Medic!
Emergency Room Excitement
Dead as a Doda
My Friend John's Testis
5 Soldiers 6 Police 0 Brains
Why I'm the Last of Nine Children
Eat the Young
A Clean Toilet
Feces Pieces
Why Kids Leave the Farm
Lawnmower Mechanics
Cesium Initiative
It Gets Worse...
Fill 'er Up!
Final Flick of Bic
Is it Loaded?
Compacted Ignorance
Robot Reaper
Extensible Aluminum Stave
Bicycle Blues
Bug Repellent
Brush with Stupidity
Prop Arc Safety
Surprise Flush
Pop Like a Grape
A Darwin Dog
Round Lake Short Cut
Man Versus Mower
Tourist Trap
Testing the Waters
The Egg Factory
Bye Bye Birdie
Brewery Mishap
Instant Sunrise
Other Personal Years 
2007 2006 2005 2004 2003 2002 2001 2000 1999 Vintage
 
~ Randomizer ~
Newsletter
Gift Shop
Rules  Search
Contact Darwin
Submit a Story
Philosophy Forum
Home

  

Darwin Awards
2000 Personal Accounts
Email a Friend The Darwin Awards salutes the spirit portrayed in the following personal accounts, submitted by loyal (and sometimes reluctant) readers. Next
Prev
Random

It Gets Worse...  
2000 Personal Account

(March 1999, South Africa) I was getting a lift home from a chess tournament, and my friend Jason and his mom were fighting. He got out of the car and ran away, and his mom urged me to chase after him. Trying to show off my pace, I sprinted towards Jason at top speed. Now, I have very weak eyes, and I happened to overlook a chain, which I ran straight into, somersaulted over, and landed on the ground with a nasty cut across my neck.

In shock, I stood up and looked towards the car, feeling faint. I saw Jason's mom running towards me, signaling me to take a step forward. Little did I know there was a steep flight of stairs behind me, formerly protected by the chain barrier. I interpreted her hand movements as a signal to take a step back, which I did.

I fell down all three flights of stairs and landed on some beer bottles. Luckily I was alright, just a bit shaken. But as I stood up, I began to vomit. I put my hands down on the ground -- right onto the broken glass, which lacerated the nerves in my fingers.

Covered with blood, with me crying my eyes out, we started for home. Jason's mom was shaken by the incident, and was driving badly. At a traffic circle, she jumped right over it and we had a traffic accident. The only one injured? Me!

DarwinAwards.com © 1994 - 2008

Submitted by: David Swartz

Awful? 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Great?
Hate it! Love it!
Previous Directions Next

Visit the Darwin Awards Giftshop

The Darwin Awards Gift Shop

$16 Tree of Life T-Shirt / Grey
Heavy 100% cotton Hanes Beefy-T with an inadvisable tree-sawing situation on the front... and a few scattered leaves on the back! Click on the image for a full view. This one is not based on any story, but shows an amusingly apt situation.
Buy the Tree of Life T-Shirt

 

 


Advanced Search

HomeRulesFAQsAwardsSlushSite Map
DarwinAward | HonorableMention | PersonalAccount | UrbanLegend