Grain alcohol and fire don't mix.
After consuming many cocktails at a party, my friends and I had a
BRILLIANT idea to pour a shot of ALCOHOL and set it on FIRE and drink
it. I believe the ultimate goal was to impress the ladies present.
This excellent suggestion would be easy to accomplish, since we had nearly
pure grain alcohol in front of us. Let me add that the person who
described the flaming shot neglected to mention that you are supposed to
blow it out before swallowing it.
So we poured the liquor into a shot glass and set it on fire. So far, so
good! We looked at each other, each hoping someone else would volunteer to
be the guinea pig. After much debate, we had our first contender. My
friend proceded to pick up the shot glass, put it down, pick it up, put it
down, and finally he simply stared at the flames for a good two minutes.
"C'mon, man up!"
"?!$%!! that!" he declared.
I decided that the democratic process would produce no results. I picked
up the hot glass, and slammed the flamming concoction down my throat.
Upside: the fire was quickly extinguished after I closed my mouth.
Downside: the inside of my mouth felt and tasted like it was burning. For
I was too much in shock to speak.
The friend who had previously hesitated saw how easily the shot had been
dispatched, and prepared another for himself. Not to be outdone, he poured
the grain alcohol right up to the rim of the glass and lit it. Upside: he
would out-do me! Downside: completely full shot glasses are difficult to
lift without spilling. And if the liqour is on fire when it spills...
He proceded to light his hand and the countertop on fire. Then,
demonstrating that drinking does in fact reduce reaction time, he tried to
stop drinking it but ended up pouring it on his face and sweatshirt.
Upside: his goatee insulated his face from the fire. Downside: hair is
flammable. He caught on fire.
Most of his facial hair was burning by the time we stopped laughing long
enough to realize he had no idea what to do. We extinguished the growing
blaze by slapping him in the face with a kitchen towel. Fortunately for
us, but less fortunately for the gene pool, this event did not qualify
anyone for a Darwin Award.
Moral: Any feat involving fire and grain alcohol that is described as
"The ultimate goal was to impress the ladies present."
"Lick, sip, and duck!"
"A red hot time."
DarwinAwards.com © 1994 - 2017
Submitted by: Colin