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Darwin Awards
2006 Personal Accounts
Email a Friend The Darwin Awards salutes the spirit portrayed in the following personal accounts, submitted by loyal (and sometimes reluctant) readers. Next Prev Random

 
 
Revenge of Mother Love
2006 Personal Account

An example of temper overriding thoughts of safety.

Graeme was watching a Soccer Cup final on TV with his father and younger brother. As his mum set about her seemingly endless rounds of household chores, she bemoaned Father's lack of interest in washing the car, mowing the lawn, etc. Guys, you know the drill.

After ten minutes of ironing and griping, she uttered the classic female complaint. "You never pay attention to me!" This met with the usual response from the sofa. "Yeah, in a minute." This was the final straw. She decided to take charge of the situation.

Dramatically, she huffed into the kitchen and returned with a large pair of scissors, stomped loudly 'round the back of the TV, grabbed what she thought was the cable, and cut though it with one deft movement of the shears. She then made an involuntarily deft movement, flying across the room and crashing against the door into a dazed and electri-fried heap.

At that point, Father and his sons started paying attention to Mum. She survived, and she even laughs about it today. But Father always seems sheepish when the story is told.

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Darwin Awards III: Survival of the Fittest

Hardback. 304 pages. Autographed.
$15
The human race's most popular humor series returns with a brand-new collection of macabre mishaps and misadventures. Honoring those who improve our gene pool by inadvertently removing themselves from it, the Darwin Awards III shows once more how uncommon common sense still is.

Salute the sheriff who inadvertently shot himself--twice! Witness the insurance defrauder who amputated his leg with a chainsaw! Heed the story of the farmer who avoided bee stings by sealing his head in a plastic bag! Cringe at the man crushed by a branch he'd just severed... directly over his head!

123 new stories, 18 full-page illustrations, plus discussions of transgenic animals, the origin of life, and more.

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