| |
1998 Personal Accounts
| The Darwin Awards salutes the spirit portrayed in the following personal accounts, submitted by loyal (and sometimes deceased) readers. |
   |
| |||||||
Rub Dub Dub Men in a Tub
|
(December 1997) G. Wallace declares, "This is real! The people involved are still alive, and they were not using drugs at the time, although I sincerely hope that their judgment was clouded by their previous drug use." About 10 years ago, two 17-year-old friends named Ronnie and Steve were bored and scrounging about for something to do. They noticed that Steve's father had thrown out his old hot tub to make room for the new one, and they decided to sail it across a nearby canal. I don't know exactly how deep this canal is, but I do know that it is a major shipping channel with a horrendous undertow. It is at least 200 yards across. | Ronnie and Steve arrive at the canal, put the hot tub in, and are happy to find that it floats. They climb in and manage to paddle a quarter of the way across the canal. By this time, quite a bit of water has splashed in, and is sloshing around the bottom of the hot tub. They decide that they need to remove this water. They reasoned, "Since the water is coming in over the sides, if we pull out this drain plug, the water will go out the hole." So they pull out the plug, and you can imagine what happened next. Luckily, it was a slow day in the shipping channel, and the Coast Guard rescued them within an hour. They were freezing cold, but unhurt. |
|
| |
 Next
|
Darwin Awards III: Survival of the Fittest
Hardback. 304 pages. Autographed.$15 The human race's most popular humor series returns with a brand-new collection of macabre mishaps and misadventures. Honoring those who improve our gene pool by inadvertently removing themselves from it, the Darwin Awards III shows once more how uncommon common sense still is. Salute the sheriff who inadvertently shot himself--twice! Witness the insurance defrauder who amputated his leg with a chainsaw! Heed the story of the farmer who avoided bee stings by sealing his head in a plastic bag! Cringe at the man crushed by a branch he'd just severed... directly over his head! 123 new stories, 18 full-page illustrations, plus discussions of transgenic animals, the origin of life, and more. Autographed by Author! |
|
Home |