Charles Darwin's Darwin Awards 
HOME
Darwin Awards
Honorable Mentions
Urban Legends
Personal Accounts
Slush Pile
2009 May Slush
Boom Boom Bees !!!!
DA:Short Circuit
Gold Rush
HM:What else do you do on July 5th?
Bad Idea...worse motivation.
x:Cycling Away
PA:I want a refund !!
PA:Why didn't this work?
PA:Caps and Hammers
This Old Barn
DA:How to Dispose of Dynamite
x:Stupid Mistake
x:Gone fishing with a coat hanger
Deadly Dynamite Disposal
DA:Man dies while demolishing shed
Paint Can Golf
x:Spinner
Horse tranquilizers help man sleep
Gone Fishing
Older Slush 
 
~ Random Story ~
Newsletter
Gift Shop
Rules  Search
Contact Darwin
Submit a Story
Philosophy Forum
Home

  

Darwin Awards
2009 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

Gold Rush

2009 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

When I was 18 I worked for my summer camp that I have been at since I was 7. I instructed archery which meant I didn’t have a specific group of children to watch, so on one of our special days “Gold Rush” I was a “bad guy.” The day involves all the kids dressing up as cowboys and searching for gold painted rocks which they can turn in for candy. As a “bad guy” I went around stealing the gold back and spreading it around for the kids to find. There are also “good guys” going around attempting to arrest the “bad guys.” These are usually my two bosses and the three horse staff. At the end of the day the “bad guys” need to be caught so we can have a little skit and go back to a normal schedule. I was friends with the horse staff and they had been trying, unsuccessfully to catch me all day. So I thought it would be a great idea to pretend to be lassoed by one of the horse staff, I didn’t just wrap the rope around me but I tied it around my chest with my arms across my chest. My arms were tied up so I couldn’t use them. My next good idea was to let the 16 year old and least experienced rider of the three hold the rope. When we were walking down to the fire pit for the skit a few groups of the 5-7 age kids had wandered away from the skit area and spotting me tied to the horses started to run and scream once they saw me tied to the horse. This may seem like something I had no control over but like I said I’ve been there since I was 7 and this was my fourth year working there and I was and still, even by my friends who know this story, considered the more mature and responsible one. In other words I should’ve known the other staff wouldn’t follow the rules. As the kids came running at us my rope was held by the third rider in line. When the kids got close the horses spooked and I quickly became first in line of three rapidly accelerating horses. I turned and ran while screaming for the girl holding my rope to let go. I didn’t know that the hand she was using to hold my rope was being used to steer her horse. The horse I was attached to passed me, but before the other two did I tripped. The last thing I saw was my feet flying up in front of me. Then I woke up on the ground because two seven year old twin boys were kicking me in the ribs and going through my pockets looking for the gold I had on me. At this point unbeknownst to me I had a concussion, spine and leg injury. I’m an EMT, worked as a lifeguard, and have taken multiple medical classes so I know how to tell if someone has a concussion but having one makes it very difficult to correctly judge if you have one or not. So with my amazing medical knowledge I decided I could get up. Now I just got dragged by a horse and I don’t know how I managed to be missed being trampled by the other two, but I thought it would be a good idea to go swimming. I don’t remember anything after falling so I don’t know how I didn’t drown. After multiple attempts to earn the award my friend noticed something wrong and had me taken to the hospital. It took3 years and I’m only just recovering but I’ll always have a slight limp to remind me tying yourself to a horse is a bad idea.

Submitted on 05/15/2009

Submitted by: cwolfe002@student.monroecc.edu
Reference: I was the near miss August 2006

Copyright © 2009 DarwinAwards.com

Great? 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 0 Awful?
Love it! Hate it!
>> Moderator Scores <<

Bruce said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
Tying yourself up like that and allowing you to be tied to a horse was incredibly dumb. You're lucky you survived your little bit of play acting. Thanks for sharing the story!


Candi said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
Like you said, you'd been going there for years and knew the drill...:)


$16 Smoking Crater T-Shirt / Black
Heavy 100% cotton, black Hanes Beefy-T with an inadvisable cigarette break on the front... a smoking crater on the back! Click on the image for a full view. Based on true stories. Errata: TNT will not explode in the presence of a lit cigarette. The man was actually sitting on a crate of gelignite.
Buy the Smoking Crater T-Shirt

 

Slush Pile
Slush Pile Rejects


Advanced Search

HomeRulesFAQsAwardsSlushSite Map
DarwinAward | HonorableMention | PersonalAccount | UrbanLegend