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Running With Knives
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Vacuming and gasoline explosive!
Attempted Suicide by Cat
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When Stealing, Remember: Safety Fir
Don't eat nachos on a motorcyle
Don't Drill In The Rain
A Night On the Road
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Dallas copper thief is done
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Darwin Awards
2008 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
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A Night On the Road

2008 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

One day, an 18 year-old boy decides to take his life into his own hands, living the life on the edge...

He believes that he could take his bike and a backpack full of provisions to Oklahoma city all the way from Nevada, riding on the shoulder of the highway.

Well, the day was blisteringly hot. He, taking the environment into mind, decides to wait and travel at night, under the light of the moon and stars.

Unbeknownst to him, the upcoming section of road had no gaurdrails in certain areas of the hills it was on. He starts off on his journey again, fully refreshed from his rest under a shade tree. There was only one problem though... there was no moon...

The unfortunate boy continues to ride his bike, when an oncoming car blinds him. No where to go except away from the car and it's painfully bright headlights, he swerves towards the edge, forgetting all about the edge of the highway.

Nothing to keep him from the forty-foot drop, he loses traction, and he and his bike fall foarty feet into the river below...

Now, there being running water, the impact was softer, and thus not fatal. He also lands in a deeper section of the river.

He struggles to get to the river bank, and manages to grab onto a tree root protuding from the dirt, climbs onto the dry land, and passes out from fatigue...

Now, although he did not not die from impact or hypothermia (the nights are cold in the desert, and he was wet), the car that had blinded him reported the accident, and the police arrived momentarily, gathering him into the car, and taking him into temporary custody.

Now, how do I know all these details, you ask? I'm the boy. I'm still 18, and I'm never touching a bike again...

Submitted on 08/13/2008

Submitted by: Clint
Reference:

Copyright © 2008 DarwinAwards.com

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Bruce said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
Thanks, Clint. I'm glad you survived to share this tale with us! Since it sounds like you hopefully learned a valuable lesson we likely won't ever be nominating you for a full DA.


James said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
Damn! GREAT punch line at the end! A keeper! I'm glad you're staying clear of bikes. Hopefully this is the last we'll ever hear of you here at DA...except perhaps as a CONTRIBUTOR! :-) T^hanks again, Clint!


The Darwin Awards Gift Shop

The Darwin Awards: Evolution in Action

Hardback. 327 pages. Autographed.
$15
185 Stories! In the ongoing saga of Survival of the Fittest, meet the thief who steals electrical wires without shutting off the current! Marvel at the would-be pilot who suspends his lawnchair from helium balloons! Learn from the man who peers into a gas can using a cigarette lighter...!

This book also includes a History of the Darwin Awards, Darwin Haiku, and a dozen humorous discussions of the implications of evolution, including the origin of idiots, and the role of testosterone.

Autographed by Author!

 

 

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