Apparently the star of this story whose name was withheld for sake of privacy and his young bride are expecting their first born son this coming fall, and one of the great debates is sparked: circumcision. She is completely against the idea; he is completely for it. The tide seems to be turned when she points out to her husband that he, himself, is uncircumcised, and the matter was quietly put to rest.

Well it turns out that the reason he was so staunchly in support of the procedure was the unending teasing he himself received as a child for not fitting in, but he had never worked up the nerve to have it done as an adult. Apparently, his wife worked the nerve up for him, but she also built up his machismo meter.

Several days later, after some studying on the internet, he used an exacto knife and "some bits of plastic" to perform autocircumcision and prove what a simple and safe operation it was. Surprisingly enough, the results were crude but successful. He even thought ahead enough to thoroughly bandage the area.

Unfortunately, he neglected to use any sort of antiseptic during the bandaging, nor took proper care of it afterwards. Fortunately (for him, at least) his horrified wife finally convinced him on the second day of recovery to go to the hospital when changing the gauze revealed more yellowish-brown discharge than anticipated.

A bit of clean up surgery, proper stitching and bandaging, and a sturdy regimine of antibiotics were able to save the man's genitals - at least what he hadn't intentionally removed. No word on how this affected his wife's decision for their child.

If I can obtain further details or confirmation I'll be in touch!

Submitted on 08/12/2008

Submitted by: Chuck
Reference: May 2008

Copyright © 2008 DarwinAwards.com

Candi said:
Definitely Keep: Honorable Mention
Oww, oww, oww...there is a _reason_ there are trained professionals for such procedures! If he had let the infection progress instead of seeing a doctor, the infection could well have created enough damage to take him out of the gene pool. And he got his info of the NET!?! Dan-ger-ous. Did he also research that circumcision is performed less than 50% as often as it was 20-30 yrs. ago? I-di-ot!

James said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
Even in biblical times, the clerics who performed circumcision knew what they were doing! Needless to say, X-Acto blades are sharp enough to do the job...but guess what? THEY AREN'T STERILIZED!!! For that alone, I will keep this as a PA!