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Use the door stupid.
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Darwin Awards
2008 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

Use the door stupid.

2008 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

This is the link to this story..http://clarionledger.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20080529/NEWS/80529009

I am an EMT in Jackson and ran this call. The gentleman in this article lived at this address, which belonged to his aunt. On numerous occasions in the past, when he got drunk, his aunt would kick him out for the night until he sobered up. This happened on the night in question.

At around 2am this morning, the gentleman apparently thought he was sober enough to come home. He found the door locked, so instead of knocking on the door, he punched the window NEXT to the door, at which time he slashed his arm and severed an artery. Instead of banging on the door next to the window and yelling for help, he went to the back of the house and tried the back door which was locked as well. He came back around the house and attempted to jump through the window, at which time he impaled himself on a piece of glass in the window, where he died. He was found with his back half hanging on the outside, and top half hanging on the inside.

Submitted on 05/29/2008

Submitted by: Anonymous
Reference: Clarionledger.com May 29th,2008

Copyright © 2008 DarwinAwards.com

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Bruce said:
Definitely Keep: Darwin Award
We've had similar stories involving drunks trying to beat up helpless windows but I think this one tops all the others based on this guy's determination. Punching out one window and severing an artery then going around and looking for another window to jump through shows some serious dedication to his stupid antics. Thanks for sharing this with us!


Chip said:
Definitely Keep: Darwin Award
The only thing missing in this one would have been if the dude had for some reason taken off his clothes. But good enough to pass along in my opinion. Thanks for the story.


The Darwin Awards: Evolution in Action

Hardback. 327 pages. Autographed.
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185 Stories! In the ongoing saga of Survival of the Fittest, meet the thief who steals electrical wires without shutting off the current! Marvel at the would-be pilot who suspends his lawnchair from helium balloons! Learn from the man who peers into a gas can using a cigarette lighter...!

This book also includes a History of the Darwin Awards, Darwin Haiku, and a dozen humorous discussions of the implications of evolution, including the origin of idiots, and the role of testosterone.

Autographed by Author!

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