Charles Darwin's Darwin Awards 
HOME
Darwin Awards
Honorable Mentions
Urban Legends
Personal Accounts
Slush Pile
2008 May Slush
Use the door stupid.
(?)Trailer Park Vacetomy
Superdildo
()Revenge of the Trees
(DA)Up Up and .... BANG
Thief broken into lion den, eaten
(?)Jeff Powers Died for Love
Don't try to mow your living room
Shot in the spot
acetylene torch
How Not To React
Hanging competition
Russian dies in fishing shocker
Lose Lose Situation
Who Needs A Lifejecket?
Died after mass fight
dynamite pizza
One Giant Leap of Madness
spitting contest gone too far
Crocodile Hunter Conspiracy Theory
Flintlock Fun!
That's one way to deal with an itch
Davenport man hit by train
An inch from a Darwin Award
Furnace Folly
Man dies cutting RR wire
Laundry Buzz
Why we have safety lectures.
Lobbyist Attacks Shark
Let me show you how it's done
"Honor" Student Dies During Prank
Another thief electrocuted
Demonstrating Safe Parking Procedur
Metal thieves shocked by power line
Water Wonder...
You can sense a lot of worry in her
Stepping before stopping
A blade in the hand
The Marriage That Nearly Killed Him
Student died after leaping over wal
Man electrocuted stealing copper wi
Intelligence Gives an HM, not a DA
Not That Clever
Child's Play?
Shocking Greed
How to make a cannon
Laughing at Death
Man burned trying to take copper wi
Safety Last!
The Big Bang Theory?
Into Thick Air...
Two fall down cliff
Balcony Jumper
Safety Last!
Older Slush 
 
~ Randomizer ~
Newsletter
Gift Shop
Rules  Search
Contact Darwin
Submit a Story
Philosophy Forum
Home

  

Darwin Awards
2008 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

A blade in the hand

2008 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

My brother told me this story about his nieghbors that lived next door to him. He said he had the phone in one hand to call 911 and the camcorder in the other for America's funniest home videos.

Luckily, the idiots didn't get hurt, but I think they deserve an honorable mention. Now these guys were the type of "good ol'boy" you find down south that like to drink. Well, they had let the grass in their yard get about waist high, and finally the neighborhood got a petition stating that they had to mow it or be fined or even kicked out. This petition was started when they saw a baby deer running out of their yard. Now this is in the middle of a nice subdivision in the city mind you.

So, anyway, the two geniuses were outside getting ready to mow thier lawn with a push lawn mower. Well, they couldn't get it started, and my brother was watching their ingenuity first hand from his back yard.

One of them was trying to pull the cord to get it going, while the other was laying on the ground trying to spin the blade with his hand to help, "get it going" So, if the lawnmower had actually started up, the genius on the ground spinning the blade would have lost a hand.

Needless to say God was watching over those idiots that day, and they ended up moving out shortly after, but who knows how long thier luck has lasted now.

Submitted on 05/20/2008

Submitted by: Anonymous
Reference: Eminence, KY 2000

Copyright © 2008 DarwinAwards.com

Great? 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 0 Awful?
Love it! Hate it!
>> Moderator Scores <<

Bruce said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
Now that's some serious stupidity! He probably has no idea how lucky he is that the lawn mower didn't start up. Thanks for sending this in.


Chip said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
Did they get the yard mowed before they moved? I am having a hard time figuring out how dude #2 was spinning the blade unless the mower was tipped on its side. In that case he certainly could have lost more than his hand! Thanks for the story.


Darwin Awards III: Survival of the Fittest

Hardback. 304 pages. Autographed.
$15
The human race's most popular humor series returns with a brand-new collection of macabre mishaps and misadventures. Honoring those who improve our gene pool by inadvertently removing themselves from it, the Darwin Awards III shows once more how uncommon common sense still is.

Salute the sheriff who inadvertently shot himself--twice! Witness the insurance defrauder who amputated his leg with a chainsaw! Heed the story of the farmer who avoided bee stings by sealing his head in a plastic bag! Cringe at the man crushed by a branch he'd just severed... directly over his head!

123 new stories, 18 full-page illustrations, plus discussions of transgenic animals, the origin of life, and more.

Autographed by Author!

Slush Pile
Slush Pile Rejects


Advanced Search

HomeRulesFAQsAwardsSlushSite Map
DarwinAward | HonorableMention | PersonalAccount | UrbanLegend