Charles Darwin's Darwin Awards 
HOME
Darwin Awards
Honorable Mentions
Urban Legends
Personal Accounts
Slush Pile
2007 November Slush
UL: Taser Test
(?) Vladivostok Or Bust
(HM)Definitely non-deadly
PA: Grain Alcohol and Fire Don't Mix
(?)Loosening lug nuts.. HM
(?)Gator Makes Out Like A Bandit
(DA)Crutch, Meet Crotch
(?)Product Placement & Dismemberment
(?)Man Found Dead, Stuck In Cat Door
(DA)Tractor Electrocution
(?)How NOT to dismantle a bomb
(HM)Welding a Pipe Bomb
(HM)Letal mushroom almost letal
Man Shoots His Own Hand, Leg, and N
Canned corn
Truck drags, kills man
Condom Head
Give yourself a hand
A ride on a swiss lake
Workers dont need chemsitry lessons
A dumb idea from a dumb trucker
Threesome in your garage
Naked man suffocated in condom
How to slice up a grenade...
Determined to Die
Two nude dancers leap to death
Handy Fireworks
Man killed at Las Cruces recycling
Long Drop
Divorce would have been easier
Bikie Gang Bang
Soccer player killed by goal
Eugenics in motion.
All new Rust Blaster!
Worker Dies While Making Phone Call
Winter pedalo
tree's revenge
Man struck by towed ‘fridge dies at
man dies in cat door
Man dies trying to kill another man
Snake Bite
Killer shrimps
Sex act gonne terribly wrong!
Bizar accident
The Last Moments of Two Youths
Boat capsize
whale watching swimmer
HOARDER KILLED BY OWN RUBBISH
Whoya Gonna Blame..? THE HOSPITAL!
Snake bites woman in church
Cold Dope
Silliness and trains don't mix
Forget My Severed Arm...
House explosion injures man
Older Slush 
 
~ Random Story ~
Newsletter
Gift Shop
Rules  Search
Contact Darwin
Submit a Story
Philosophy Forum
Home

  

Darwin Awards
2007 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

All new Rust Blaster!

2007 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

Tired of rusty bolts that wont come off? Wouldn't it also be nice to remove yourself from the living world? Then why not try our new and improved combination 12 guage rust and life remover!?

A 66 year old Washington State man, fed up with not being able to remove the lug nut off his Lincoln Continental, decided to use his own improvised 'impact' wrench, namely, a 12 guauge shotgun. Our budding mechanic took aim at the offending lug nut and fired. The blast nearly removed him from the genepool. He was "...bound and determined to get that lug nut off," states Kitsap County Deputy Sherrif. The man suffered peppering of his legs from the shot, and the extend of his injuries extended to his chin. The clincher to this story, is that the man in question was stone sober, and acted alone. Perhaps if he had been a few inches closer he would have truly become a Darwin winner. Lets face it, it wasn't for a lack of trying.

Submitted on 11/13/2007

Submitted by: Ryan Price
Reference: http://www.azstarnet.com/sn/hourlyupdate/211351.php 11/13/2007

Copyright © 2007 DarwinAwards.com

Great? 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 0 Awful?
Love it! Hate it!
>> Moderator Scores <<

Chip said:
Definitely Keep: For Darwin's Eyes
Ryan, while we have had many, many submissions of this same story, your write up is extraordinarily good so I vote to ask Darwin to see this one.


Bruce said:
Definitely Keep: For Darwin's Eyes
That is a very original writeup. Thanks, Ryan!


Darwin Awards II: Unnatural Selection

Hardback. 240 pages. Autographed.
$15
A fresh collection of magnificent misadventures! Lust, Vanity, Gluttony, Greed, Sloth, Envy, and Wrath extract an evolutionary toll on the wicked. Salute the owner of an equipment training school who demonstrates the dangers of driving a forklift by failing to survive the filming of his own safety video. Witness the man who becomes a victim of his own strange passion for jumping into rivers. Heed the honest bricklayer who loses a battle of wits with 300 pounds of tools.

This book includes more History of the Awards, Gordon's Law, and 10 discussions of evolution, including speciation and the role of verbal memes in civilization.

Autographed by Author!

Slush Pile
Slush Pile Rejects


Advanced Search

HomeRulesFAQsAwardsSlushSite Map
DarwinAward | HonorableMention | PersonalAccount | UrbanLegend