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2007 September Slush
(DA) Shortcut?
(HM) Rattlesnake in Mouth
(DA) Stab in the Dark
(?) Trouser Cobra kills Cambodian man
(PA) Hedge Mower
Legally Blind Man Killed While Driv
Snakecharmer: Not!
a bridge to far!
(Hmm) Hey everybody, watch this Fly !
Killacycle lives up to it's name?
(PA) Splitting Headache
(PA) Billy the Kid
(PA) Western Massacre
How to free an elevator
(?) 16 Killed in Truck meant for Five
murderer 0 and victim 1
Backside firework prank backfires
Head in the machine
(DA) Weight Lift
Where NOT to sleep
Ignited Arsonist Shoots Self
Attempted energy theft kills father
Student tried to jump over car
Man killed building pipe bomb
Testicles & Fireworks
Jet Ski Won't Turn
Barbequed deputy
A Stolen Trick, A Darwinian Treat
home security
Booby trap gets the Boob,and an arm
How NOT to use an emergency brake
Train and Lawnchair Man
here kitty kitty
Golf Hazard
Deadly Mirror
Man Impaled Trying to Climb Fence
Twice a charm
(HM) Police Arrest Woman Allegedly Weari
Hood Surfing
extreme redneck atv riding.
(HM) Man bitten after putting rattler in
Fisherman Blows Up!
man drowns trying to ,swim to party
suffocated by sand
Out of gas?
Deadly Horseplay Claims a Woman
gunpowder redneck explosion.
Drowned Drunk
What's that smell?
Man sticks Pet Rattlesnake in mouth
Wisconsin man sues when aftershave
Woman hit by 4 cars to save dog
Police Find Man's Body, Guillotine
Personal Account:Stomach 1, Brain 0
Suicide by Guillotine
Motorcycle Stupidity - Personal Acc
Man put rattlesnake in mouth
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Darwin Awards
2007 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

Hedge Mower

2007 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

Darwin says, "Outstanding personal account!
Accepted into the archive."

ORIGINAL SUBMISSION:

A friend related this story from his daughter a plastic surgeon in Ontario Canada. His daughter's expertise is in re constructive surgery.

One day a patient was rushed in to the hospital to have the ends of his fingers of his left hand reattached. While taking the patient history it was found that this bright chap got the idea of holding a lawn mower sideways by holding onto the mower deck and applying it to his hedge. It went pretty well for a little while until the weight of the mower got a bit much and he had to readjust his grip. That was when the blade of the mower bit him.

When my friends doctor daughter was almost finished the complex job of patching up this patient another patient came in with the same problem. On investigating further it was found that this man, too, had been using his mower to trim his own hedge. Apparently he was a neighbor of the first patient and had watched his neighbor for a while and thought that it was a neat idea. He missed the part about where the first guy parted company with the ends of his fingers.

This is a true story. Often fact is so much weirder than fiction. Both of those men should have earned a Darwin Excellence award.

Submitted on 09/01/2007

Submitted by: D. Hilton
Reference:

Copyright © 2007 DarwinAwards.com

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James said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
Gadzooks! I supposed these two watched one too many episodes of "Red Green" (the main character of a comedy show which takes place in rural Ontario; Red's philosophy is "Any tool can be the RIGHT tool")! ANYWAY, I would think that a good old pair of clippers would be safer, or a relatively inexpensive hedge trimmer both safer and efficient, but I'm not those two fellows so it's a moot point! GREAT PA, thanks for sending it in!


Chip said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
Wow, a lawn mower is awfully heavy to be used for that. How in the world did he expect to trim the top? Thanks for the story, D


Darwin Awards III: Survival of the Fittest

Hardback. 304 pages. Autographed.
$15
The human race's most popular humor series returns with a brand-new collection of macabre mishaps and misadventures. Honoring those who improve our gene pool by inadvertently removing themselves from it, the Darwin Awards III shows once more how uncommon common sense still is.

Salute the sheriff who inadvertently shot himself--twice! Witness the insurance defrauder who amputated his leg with a chainsaw! Heed the story of the farmer who avoided bee stings by sealing his head in a plastic bag! Cringe at the man crushed by a branch he'd just severed... directly over his head!

123 new stories, 18 full-page illustrations, plus discussions of transgenic animals, the origin of life, and more.

Autographed by Author!

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