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2007 June Slush
(DA) Looney Water Tank Trio
Tombstoning Tradegy
Crook Holds Up Gun Shop
(DA)Not-So-Safe Sex
Roll Bounce
(PA)She Can Do Anything He Can Do
(DA)Men Play Chicken With a Train
A Dope Caught the Train
Train Driver's Urination Ejection
Another Frog Gigging Adventure
The woman of his dreams
(DA)Aspiring Astronauts
Tree Removal Expert
(DA)Naked couple fall off roof
(?)Drinking and Biking
Burglar crushed by Fan
3rd time was to far
Man Drowns in Storm Sewer
saussage bang!
(DA)Love You to Death
(DA)Oil Storage Tank jumping
Careless Snake Thief
(DA)Two naked people dead after 4-story
Man drowns after getting stuck in c
(?)Spitting Contest
(DA)Flash*Boom*Dance!
Suwannee collision kills two cousin
Sailing Banana
Can you hear me now?
A Penny Saved is a Penny... Melted?
(DA)Couple Falling off Roof
Trainsurfing
Man dies whilst astral travelling
Flaming Hackysack
(DA)Nude Couple Killed in Fall From Roo
Not So Weir-d Story
Playing Submarine
Teen Dies in Bullet Game.
(?)Spit,splat.smash!
16 wheeler closelined
Old Indian Remedy
balls in mousetrap
Stuck in Storm Sewer
Astral Travel
Lookout Above!
(DA)Oil Tank Flying Lessons
Explosive Pranks
Lookout Above!
Not quite a Darwin, maybe next time
Head First for a Phone
Mr.
Man dies in war against germs.
Last Round
Two Feared Drowned
Tree-Cutting Accident
homade bomb
(?)Almost An Award
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Darwin Awards
2007 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
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Tree Removal Expert

2007 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

I work int he emergency room at a local hospital and remember an honorable mention as the gentle man did not die or loose his private area. This guy is an "Expert in tree removal" he was in a tall tree cutting it fromt he top down to try to reduce to amount of dmg from a large tree dropping. He had tied himself to a lower portion of the tree in case he fell. He olso tied his chainsaw to the tree for the same reason. Unfortunatley he tied the chainsaw to the same spot he was tied to and to roughly the same length (???!!!!!). So the inevitable happened and he fell and hit the tree which in turn broke a vertebrea in his neck and one in his back. But that was not the worst, as the chainsaw dropped the roped pinched on the trigger which kept the chain rotating. The chainsaw came down and hit the guy in the leg about 5 inches below that special area and cut trough the bone and was about 2 inches from totally severing the guys leg when he was able to shut it down. I actually xrayed the guy with the chainsaw blade and chain still in his leg. He then went ot the operating room to check the extent of the dmg to arteries. I also was in the OR running a c-arm ( C-arm = real time xrays on a portable machine ) and he had gone through the femoral artery ( which is the main artery in your upper leg ) and the blade was keeping him from bleeding out. all in all he has a leg that i now about 1/2 inch shorter that the other and a wicked scar and story. I wish that i had saved a copy of the xrays but i did not :(

Submitted on 06/24/2007

Submitted by: nick
Reference: not sure 2001-2002

Copyright © 2007 DarwinAwards.com

Great? 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 0 Awful?
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>> Moderator Scores <<

James said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
Although this initially smacked of Urban Legend, I did a check and found nothing, so...I conclude that this is a very funny PA, and well-told! Thanks Nick!

Chip said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
Good story, Nick. Definitely a keeper. Too bad there is not supporting documentation so that we could give this guy a nod with an HM

The Darwin Awards Gift Shop

Darwin Awards III: Survival of the Fittest

Hardback. 304 pages. Autographed.
$15
The human race's most popular humor series returns with a brand-new collection of macabre mishaps and misadventures. Honoring those who improve our gene pool by inadvertently removing themselves from it, the Darwin Awards III shows once more how uncommon common sense still is.

Salute the sheriff who inadvertently shot himself--twice! Witness the insurance defrauder who amputated his leg with a chainsaw! Heed the story of the farmer who avoided bee stings by sealing his head in a plastic bag! Cringe at the man crushed by a branch he'd just severed... directly over his head!

123 new stories, 18 full-page illustrations, plus discussions of transgenic animals, the origin of life, and more.

Autographed by Author!

 

 

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