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2007 June Slush
(DA) Looney Water Tank Trio
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3rd time was to far
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saussage bang!
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Suwannee collision kills two cousin
Can you hear me now?
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Playing Submarine
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balls in mousetrap
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Darwin Awards
2007 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
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3rd time was to far

2007 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

I’ve been a Police officer for 7yrs now and this tale happened when I had only about a year’s service. I was stationed at Bromley which is covered by the Metropolitan Police Service and on one night duty we got called to a burglar who had climbed into a flat and was discovered by the flats occupants as he came home. The occupants let us into the flat and as usual we ran into shouting “police” at which freaked out the young burglar, called Chad, who promptly jumped out of the window he had climbed in through. Did I mention that this was a first floor flat? Chad ended up breaking his forearm, being arrested and taken to hospital. The next day he was put before the local Magistrates Court who granted him bail. A few weeks past and nothing was heard of about young Chad. Until again he was discovered in the middle of burgling a flat. Again he jumped out of the window he had entered by, how ever this time greeted by one of the more hairy members of the Metropolitan Police Officers who promptly bit him on the plaster cast he had received from the last time he was caught. History repeated itself as he was put before the local Magistrates Court and was granted bail. Then about 5 weeks past and nothing was heard of young Chad. Until he made his fatal error. He followed his usual method of climbing into a first floor flat window but this time from the front rather then the back but he still opened a window at the rear as an escape route. Not being a person of much luck was young Chad, the occupant came home whilst he was still inside the flat. Naturally as some one was coming through the front of the flat Chad went to the rear window, not knowing that the block of flats was built on the side of a hill so what he thought was a first floor flat from the front was a 3rd floor flat at the rear and fell to his demise. Which leads me to believe he never learnt from his first 2 mistakes and should have checked out his possible escape routes before he tried to use them.

Submitted on 06/09/2007

Submitted by: Daver's
Reference: personal account and local kent papers

Copyright © 2007 DarwinAwards.com

Great? 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 0 Awful?
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>> Moderator Scores <<

Graham said:
Neutral: Personal Account
Poor Chad. Had he stayed at school and learned some "jommetry", he may still be with us. Alas . . . .


James said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
As they say, "three strikes and you're OUT"! A shameful waste of a life, but a very nice PA! Thanks!


Chip said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
This one is more than the normal fleeing criminal meets his maker story. Thanks for the story, Daver.


Darwin Awards III: Survival of the Fittest

Hardback. 304 pages. Autographed.
$15
The human race's most popular humor series returns with a brand-new collection of macabre mishaps and misadventures. Honoring those who improve our gene pool by inadvertently removing themselves from it, the Darwin Awards III shows once more how uncommon common sense still is.

Salute the sheriff who inadvertently shot himself--twice! Witness the insurance defrauder who amputated his leg with a chainsaw! Heed the story of the farmer who avoided bee stings by sealing his head in a plastic bag! Cringe at the man crushed by a branch he'd just severed... directly over his head!

123 new stories, 18 full-page illustrations, plus discussions of transgenic animals, the origin of life, and more.

Autographed by Author!

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