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Darwin Awards
2007 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

Cops Say Culprit Caught in Cemetery

2007 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

A night of drinking and tomb stone tipping ended for a 22 year old Merrillville man when one of the monuments came crashing down on his legs, police said. Police said a security guard found Michael David Schreiver passed out and pinned under a 1,000 pound-head stone, shortly before 8 am Sunday, at Calumet Park Cemetery.

Schreiver, who faces charges of criminal trespassing, criminal mischief, and public intoxification, was transported to Methodist Hospitals Southlake Campus in Merrillville, Indiana.

Both his legs were broken during the incident, and he was scheduled to undergo surgery on one of his legs, Merrrille patrol officer, Ray Smith said.

Smith said it took five officers to remove the heavy headstone from Schreiver's body, and the family name at the top of the headstone left its mark on the suspect, he said.

"The letter "V" (in the family name) left an imprint on Schreiver's thigh," Smith said.

In addition to facing criminal charges, Schreiver also faces possible restitution to the cemetery for the 14 headstones he toppled over and - in some cases- damaged. Police chief, Nicholas Bravos said. Estimated damaged to the headstones

totaled about $8400, Bravos said.

Schreiver told police he and a companion had been drinking at Beaver's Bar until about 4 am before going to the cemetery.

Schreiver estimated he had been trapped under the headstone for more than three hours before police arrived, Bravors said.

The suspect would not divulged companion's name to police, Bravos said.

Submitted on 05/13/2007

Submitted by: Susan M. White
Reference: The Times, Hammond Edition, 5/08/07, front page

Copyright © 2007 DarwinAwards.com

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James said:
Definitely Keep: For Darwin's Eyes
Thanks for submitting this, Susan. This version has a bit of additional information. Apparently the victim WAS toppling gravestones. Even though this is basically just another act of vandalism, I feel there's an element of divine intervention at play here! I will pass this on to Darwin for her perusal...!


Shadow said:
Definitely Toss: Not Amusing
I still think this is a crime not a darwin. Thanks for submitting though!


Graham said:
Definitely Toss: Not Amusing
We already have details of this crime. Thanks, Susan.


Chip said:
Definitely Keep: For Darwin's Eyes
I'm with James on this. Thanks for sending the story with more information, Susan.


Darwin Awards II: Unnatural Selection

Hardback. 240 pages. Autographed.
$15
A fresh collection of magnificent misadventures! Lust, Vanity, Gluttony, Greed, Sloth, Envy, and Wrath extract an evolutionary toll on the wicked. Salute the owner of an equipment training school who demonstrates the dangers of driving a forklift by failing to survive the filming of his own safety video. Witness the man who becomes a victim of his own strange passion for jumping into rivers. Heed the honest bricklayer who loses a battle of wits with 300 pounds of tools.

This book includes more History of the Awards, Gordon's Law, and 10 discussions of evolution, including speciation and the role of verbal memes in civilization.

Autographed by Author!

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