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(?)Blood-thirsty man bites Viper
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(?)Cutting Edge Robbery
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Darwin Awards
2007 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

Cutting Edge Robbery

2007 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

Darwin says, "Hmm. Thanks for the submission, it was well written, C.K. A lovely addition to the slush pile. A true criminal mastermind."
Lin, once a 24-year-old male in Hong Kong, had actually made good planning for the robbery. He dressed himself as a parcel delivery guy, and brought two weapons instead of one. One of them is a special weapon - an electric stun gun. It can produce 20,000Volts to 100,000 Volts of electricity, very sufficient for a kill.

He entered a company with confidence. He got his stun gun out. He hit a staff in the company with the stun gun. Bang! Aw! Bang! Aw! Bang! Aw!

Well, this was not the sound of electrocution... It was the sound generated by hitting someone with a light-weight hard object!

It is obvious that Lin didn't check whether the the stun gun was functional before his mission!

Lin was then hit by another staff in the company, and his stun gun dropped. As an illegal item in Hong Kong, it must have been difficult for Lin to get the stun gun. He wanted to get it back. And he knelt down to pick it up.

This was a fatal error.

Did I tell you about the cuttingedge technology? Well... I didn't mean the stun gun!

Lin got an iron-age invention - a beef knife - in a bag in front of his chest, as a spare weapon. It was wrapped inside layers of newspaper, but ancestry technology should not be underestimated. When he bent his body, he pressed onto the knife accidentially, and the knife simply went through his thigh. After leaving the site, he was later discovered unconscious due to rapid bloodloss, and reached destiny in a few hours.

The ancestors had successfully improved the gene pool.

Submitted on 04/03/2007

Submitted by: C K Yuen
Reference: 2007-4-3 Singtao daily(google translation needed) http://www.singtao.com/yesterday/loc/0403ao03.html

Copyright © 2007 DarwinAwards.com

Great? 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 0 Awful?
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>> Moderator Scores <<

Chip said:
Definitely Keep: For Darwin's Eyes
Although we already have this one, your submission provides more details. Thanks for sending it, C K


Bruce said:
Definitely Keep: For Darwin's Eyes
Yep, more detail than the original submission. Thanks, C K!


The Darwin Awards Gift Shop

Darwin Awards II: Unnatural Selection

Hardback. 240 pages. Autographed.
$15
A fresh collection of magnificent misadventures! Lust, Vanity, Gluttony, Greed, Sloth, Envy, and Wrath extract an evolutionary toll on the wicked. Salute the owner of an equipment training school who demonstrates the dangers of driving a forklift by failing to survive the filming of his own safety video. Witness the man who becomes a victim of his own strange passion for jumping into rivers. Heed the honest bricklayer who loses a battle of wits with 300 pounds of tools.

This book includes more History of the Awards, Gordon's Law, and 10 discussions of evolution, including speciation and the role of verbal memes in civilization.

Autographed by Author!

 

 

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