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2003 December Slush
Some people never learn
All Things Must Pass
Short Cut Cut Short
Down AND Out!!
Industrial Idiocy.
Going out with a bang
Died of dehydration
ER Doc Disables Seat Belt
Human Pinata
Leap of Faith
Snap Ring Snaps
I like my bike
Don't Break The Ice
Aviation fire bugs
Car won't start!
Three Robbers, No Aim
Baghdad
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Snakes don't know kindness
The Human Pinata in Mexico
machette
"They'll Never Find Us Here"
Dog Wins
Fall guy faces bungy team wrat
DRUNKEN SNOWTUBER
Extreme Skiing injury
Bungy jumping - sans rope
Stolen Compressor Kills Thief
Smoking Bum
Never leave water behind
Flaming Frathouse Cocktail
Inner tube rider slams into co
sic semper robbie williams fan
Head for the Euro Summit
stupid prank gone bad
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Darwin Awards
2003 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
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Don't Break The Ice

2003 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

A couple of kids I knew decided to get drunk one friday night. Well, we live in Massachusetts, and there's not much to do on a friday night, so they decided to go visit some "scary places". This brought them to an old abandoned train tunnel in Clinton MA, it was once used to get trains across the Clinton Dam. Well, I've been there, and in the winter, Icicles twenty feet tall hang from the ceiling of this cave/tunnel. It's actually quite beautiful.

Well these kids, one of whom was a good friend of mine, decided they might as well throw some rocks at the icicles. Of course, they were drunk, and couldn't hit it from where they were standing. So this one kid, his name was Joe, decided to slip his way across ice and water to stand underneath the icicle. He couldn't possibly miss from here.

And he didn't. He hit the icicle bout mid way up. The thing cracked a bit and Joe scrambled to get out of the way, but he slipped on the ice. As he was climbing back to his feet a huge chunk of ice came down on him, crushing him. His friends took off, scared to death. They went back and found him there the next day, frozen to death under a huge piece of an icicle.

Submitted on 12/11/2003

Submitted by: Mike Pollock
Reference:

Copyright © 2003 DarwinAwards.com

Great? 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 0 Awful?
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>> Moderator Scores <<

Daniel said:
Definitely Keep: Darwin Award
"let's stand under something that weighs a ton, then see if we can break it" Duh!

Jack said:
Neutral: Personal Account
Ah, the story of "Joe, the Iceman of Massachusetts." Doubt if they have glacers in Massachusetts, so I guess that this will have to do. Nice write up.

Charles said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
I'll agree with Daniel here. Stand on a slick surface directly under something that weighs more than you do and try to break it? Does show the cleansing effects of alcohol on the gene pool, though.

Darwin Awards III: Survival of the Fittest

Hardback. 304 pages. Autographed.
$15
The human race's most popular humor series returns with a brand-new collection of macabre mishaps and misadventures. Honoring those who improve our gene pool by inadvertently removing themselves from it, the Darwin Awards III shows once more how uncommon common sense still is.

Salute the sheriff who inadvertently shot himself--twice! Witness the insurance defrauder who amputated his leg with a chainsaw! Heed the story of the farmer who avoided bee stings by sealing his head in a plastic bag! Cringe at the man crushed by a branch he'd just severed... directly over his head!

123 new stories, 18 full-page illustrations, plus discussions of transgenic animals, the origin of life, and more.

Autographed by Author!

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