A Chronicle of Enterprising Demises
We salute the improvement of the species
by honoring those who accidentally remove themselves from it, thereby
ensuring that the next generation is one idiot smarter.
Of necessity, this award is (generally) bestowed posthumously.

January 2007	"What would Darwin do?"
2006 Darwin Awards Announced! What would Darwin do? 2006 Honorable Mentions! DEVO is our patron band: the name refers to the devolution of the human race. Here lie 670 stories: please support this archive of "enterprising demises" and buy a book! For New Year's, I met Fyodor, a network security god! Previous New Years celebrations have seen us swinging from electrified wires, making amateur fireworks, going for a frozen swim, decorating tigers with flowers, and playing drinking games with a landmine. New Book! $13.57 [ Read More ] Autographed Bookplate? Send me your snailMail. 126 stories, plus Science Essays! STAR WARS, Belatedly Disqualified! Christine Boskoff gets a pass; she was on a two-person expedition in the Himlayas; although she wasn't exactly playing it safe, she knew the risks, and she had tackled dozens of serious peaks, including Mount Everest, with minimal support. Darwin Awards Movie Coming Soon! New pictures of Winona & Feinnes! Great 2006 Darwin Awards: HAMMER OF DOOM: A Brazil man tried to disassemble a missile by car, and by sledgehammer... COPPER KITE STRING: Precautions must be taken to avoid sudden electrocution... HIGH ON LIFE: Four feet found protruding from a helium advertising balloon... SCORE FOR GOLIATH: A mythical giant felled by a humble slingshot: a modern speargun versus an underwater leviathan... FAITHFUL FLOTATION: a pastor who could literally walk on water... STUBBED OUT: If a doctor advises that the one thing you must avoid is an open flame, most people ould not strike a match... Astonishing Honorable Mentions: FLYWATTER: Robert used an artillery shell as a desk paperweight, and whe a hapless insect wandered by... SEVERELY FAITHFUL: during a bitter marital spat, a husband proved his faithfulness when he divorced himself from temptation... SNAKE IN THE GRASS: A black adder slithered into view, and a Scotland hiker grabbed the photo op... Dude had a screw loose. Glad he didn't reproduce. Darwin saves the day. Don't miss our mottos! "Chlorinating the Gene Pool" "Where Evolution Hits the Pavement" "Die and Learn" "The Tree of Life is Self-Pruning" "Next!" &etc. Fun Survey If you were a robber, your target of choice would be: Your Neighbor... Someone offering a Gun for sale. A Gun Store. A highrise apartment. A slaughterhouse... When it comes to sharks, It's a matter of projecting confidence. I just might inadvertently feed sharks. I would dance upon a whale carcass in a feeding frenzy. Etcetera. Last Month's Survey Friendly Links Thanks, Jay Andersen, for a great review! (But some he mentions are legends!!!) Darwinian Driving: Survival of the Fastest! Plato * Daily Kos * MySpace BeazlesBud & the 2002 Darwin Awards Calendar The Register! Thanks to Wade at Healthbolt for the link! Blueberry on Texas Oasis and Matt's Behavioral Ecology Blog Time Out (.dk) Changes in Status: NOW CONFIRMED! Swim with Dolphins CERTAINLY REMOVE: The Last Laugh (a twisted criminal) Blow Your Mind, Child Pandering (sad) Outwitting a Thief (stupid, unconfirmed) Wales Wins (sad, insane) Blow Your Mind (painfully sad) Guitars&Guns (famous guy in an accident) Doggone Foot (not funny, but poetic justice.) Gun Totin' Granny (Urban legend plus, dumb) MAYBE REMOVE? Border Crossing Fake? um, odd? Losing Face, too gross for me, Flamingo Gunfight Kinda blah. Sweet Release Sad, but good safety example. This file is corrupted: SCUBA Story COMBINE: Blondes and Oil Changes & Happy Camper. COMBINE Roller Coaster stories. Combine spitting contest stories (1, (2)) The Last Words TWO WORTHY CAUSES: Polygraph Resistance by organized scientists. Stars Asked to be Reticent About Science Wacky Warning Labels Contest Darwin Awards was Slashdotted! ( Technical notes.) Thanks especially to LMI.net!!! Meanwhile, in America... President Bush quietly claimed sweeping powers to open mail without a warrant. On December 20, he issuing a "signing statement" that declared his right to open mail under "emergency conditions," which we are perpetually in, contrary to existing law. A White House spokeswoman disputed claims that the move gives Bush new powers, and furthermore, that the Constitution allows it. One year ago, a secret program was uncovered by reporters, involving warrantless monitoring of phone calls and e-mail... Is no liberty sacred? Literary Reference "He who hesitates... is sometimes saved." -James Thurber Personal Account: http://darwinawards.com/slush/200610/pending20061007-115320.html Darwin Award: http://darwinawards.com/slush/200610/pending20061020-160332.html Honorable Mention: http://darwinawards.com/slush/200610/pending20061023-232448.html
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